I should have listened to my friends

if friends were food, id nearly starve to death. in that same metaphor, id say the friends i do have are like my vitamins. they are what i need, and they do me well, but sometimes i still feel hungry. but im too much of a picky eater.

I have a hard time meeting people. i think im secretly too judgemental, or else im afraid of judgement on myself. i just cant relate with many people. its always how its been. its hard to strike up a conversation with many folks since not many people can relate to being dirty, broke, living out of vehicles, having a job that doesnt pay, eating out of the garbage and then actually enjoying all those things. it narrows down the pool of potential friends to a very minimal amout. and then to find girls on top of that? thats a whole nuther story!

So ive learned to spend a great deal of time alone. sometimes its better that way. like when i make stupid decisions, i dont have to drag anyone through them with me. (and i make those alot.) But sometimes being alone sucks. actually alot of the times it does. most things i do would actually be better if someone were there with me.

i guess what im trying to say is... im not an outgoing person, so come be my friend.